Moving back to Dakar: top 5 tips for confused international students

The following is based off of me living in Dakar, since 2008. I have not been to the US since, not even on vacation.

«Je rentre, je ne rentre pas. Dakar me manque trop, ma famille, free rent, free food, madd, bouye, ditakh, ngalakh, mbalakh, les mensonges de Wade, ataya, my friends, summer time…les invitations gratuites, personne pour te dire “well can you put up gas money?” alors qu’on va au même endroit, like my booty on the passenger seat is going to have a damn impact on the gas usage, #gtfoh…. No place like home…”

Rentrer ou ne pas rentrer? I have a lot of freedom here, I can’t go back to asking for permission to go out… oh hell no. a curfew? shoot me….  How much am I going get paid? What if I don’t find a job . Shit, I’ll probably be paid less at my job at Macdonalds…»

Who didn’t have that monologue a little too many times? un peu? beaucoup? et surtout passionnément? or at least when graduation was close, or a nassaran said something that pissed us off? I know I have. For every dumb question about the country of Africa, I was ready to book a flight back home. For all the looks I got when I could not remember my social security number, I was like “this is it”.

If you are thinking about coming back to live in Dakar, here are a few things you might want to get ready for…

1: Electricity Cuts

You will go nuts with this sh*t. It’s brutal, annoying, and depressive. Summer time is ok but can you deal with it all year? Think about all the gadgets you got…The lights will go off when you are trying to work on a document, get dressed, watch a show, or right when the movie you took hours to understand  was going to make some sense…

Candles, patience, geum yalla, extra phone battery and lots of friends to help you kill time.

Tip 2: If you got dreads, if you are natural or you got any type of afro declinations….

All you need is again patience, and arguments or be deaf to comments, or you’ll end up a loser like me, cutting my dear dreads off… You will get all type of “omg is this real?”, “why don’t you perm it, it will look much better…’’, “what did your mother say?”, “you cannot get a job with this”, “do you smoke weed?”, “do you sing?” “do you paint”, “what are you going to do on your wedding day?” (b*tch I’m going to style it)….

Tip 3: If you thought you were going to find darkskinned people here….

Sorry, there is only me and a couple of others left, we purposely missed the khesseul boat. Ya que des diolas et des sérères métissées dans ce pays maintenant.

Tip 4: If you had your own apartment in your host country…

Ah ben désolé hein. Unless you are a dude, moving into an appartement will mean you officially turned into a hoe. So get it out of your mind if you like living in peace. Your day, and especially night activities will just have to be slightly readjusted. Before you do anything  that  can cost you your life, tell yourself, “what if mom opens the door”, then if you are still going to do ‘’it’’, tell yourself “what if dad finds out”. Nuff Said.

Tip 5: If you are looking for a job

I suggest you start applying online before coming as everything takes extra long here. Don’t worry about your first salary, because unless you were pistonné, you will get a terrible first salary, BUT  IT WILL GO UP, promis, si je mens, je vais en enfer…. *clears throat*! Recruiters care a lot about on site experience, so once you get that, you are making yourself  indispensable. + you are bilingual? That’s it, you just made it. Just gotta give time to time.

Bonus: if you are not married, you probably will be, so if you are not ready, don’t act like I haven’t warned you.

Always remember there is no place like home, I am very happy to be back and unless I am expatriated, I ain’t moving.

Cordialement,

NK